2026 Preseason Rankings

[IanC]

Brand new year. Brand new set of rankings. You know the drill. You’re probably skipping past this text already just to get the #s. I understand.

Last year, the top 6 final standings matched the top 6 regular season standings 1-to-1. Paul was ranked TENTH in 3 of our 4 predictions and ended up in 3rd . Alex was predicted 7th, 7th, 8th, and 10th, but finished 4th. And the guy that finished 2nd? No one had Ventura above 5th. Lots of swings and misses last year. Lots of fun chaos.

Looking forward to seeing your predictions, hopes & dreams, or arbitrary/subjective criteria to rank put to the page. Last year 4 teams provided predictions. Would love to see more than half the league put their list out this year.

As for me, this year I’m giving rankings but also kicking it back to the late 80’s and early 90’s with some X-FACTORS for each team.

1 @IanC - I encourage every single one of you to beat me this year for the sake of everyone else’s sanity.
X-FACTORS: 1) No new options - starting lineup is good to go, but everyone is a year older (that’s how time works) and the lack of any 1st AND 2nd round picks in the last two years could be a factor at some point. 2) Updated roles - Achane is seemingly the only player left on offense in Miami. Will that team even score touchdowns? DeVonta Smith finally returns to being his team’s WR1. Is it a 27-year-old breakout season? Lamar and Henry have a whole new coaching staff. What changes will that make to their output? These words end in a period. This sentence ends in a question mark? 3) Lack of creativity - this team is generally uncreative. Honestly that seems like a negative X-FACTOR. Boo this man.

2 @chasenrogers - giving good vibes out for the people’s champion this year. Good dude. Good team. Starting roster of heavy hitters, 3 QBs, cheering for the Chiefs and Cowboys again this year, what’s not to like?
X-FACTORS: 1) Health. CMC’s health is the main X-FACTOR here. But Walker, Olave, Lamb, and Kittle have all dealt with injuries this past year. Team is a bit of a glass cannon so-to-speak. 2) Montgomery/Pollard/Lloyd… this team needs to be able to reliably play 3 RBs in the starting lineup… unless De’Zhaun Stribling truly is the chosen one…

3 @ventura - JSN and Puka. The story almost writes itself with this team. Legit starters in every part of the starting lineup unless…
X-FACTORS: 1) Josh Jacobs having legal trouble or not. 2) Puka Nacua having PR troubles or not. 3) JSN proving last year wasn’t the perfect storm. 4) Whether or not this team’s bench is any kind of factor at all.

4 @awmelman - This team feels like it can land anywhere between 2-5. I gave them extra love last year, so I’m spreading the wealth this year. That’s not to say this squad isn’t dangerous enough to win it all because it ABSOLUTELY IS. Gibbs w/ no Monty? Gonna be like watching Superman out there. Etienne (“Ay-Chan”) might be a bell cow in NOLA. Pickens gets Dak for another year and JJ + Wilson have upgrades (hopefully) for their respective QBs. Sky’s the limit with this one.
X-FACTORS: 1) RB play outside of Gibbs. No question on talent for Hall and Etienne, but are they gonna be X-FACTORS week in and week out? 2) Brian Thomas - the dude was broken last year and idk what fixes that bizarre situation. Hopefully it was just a flukey bad year. 3) Egbuka/Godwin - ONE of these dudes needs to be really good. But if they both eat into each other’s work, they each could hinder the ceiling play for the other.

5 @gbhart - RB squad ready to rock again for another year. Now with Joe Burrow in tow, this team is looking dangerous. Young WRs in Tet and Odunze. Hopefully this squad has just opened up a window to rack up wins.
X-FACTORS: 1) Jameson Williams. Guy is a wildcard. Fast and talented and if LaPorta is out for a bit… possibly extra dangerous this year. 2) Kelce… because if he’s washed in 2026, that TE starting spot might not be helping much. 3) Saquon - last 4 years (since '22) he’s been: 6th, 13th, 1st, 13th… so are we back to a top 6 year now??

6 @mikeastock - This team’s twisting ankles two+ weeks out from the regular season . Hopefully everyone is alright, but the combo of Jeanty + Love has firepower than can last a while in this league. Anchored with Daniels/Williams and consensus TE1 Bowers and this young squad is going to be competitive for a long, long time. They should be rising up out of the tank zone now. Why only 6th? Mostly ankle stuff. And idk if the WRs are there yet (outside of London).
X-FACTORS: 1) RB’s ankles 2) WR2 and WR3 - is it Scary Terry and Tate? Is it Watson and Concepcion? Big questions there, but not necessarily bad options. 3) NE RB room - when will it be TreV’s turn?

7 @PaulDawg - Omarion and Javonte are ready to rock. Bo Nix is bringing some big nix energy. But are the WRs going to be able to hang? The question hangs with Marv and Rice.
X-FACTORS: 1) Marv and Rice. 2) Brandon Aubrey - why not? If his kicker outscores half his team every week I’m telling you there’s a chance! 3) Team Name - will this team be able to keep “Milroe Baggins” or will they have to abandon it for a new moniker? And if they change, could that be the X-FACTOR of all X-FACTORS when it comes to fantasy wins and losses?

8 @Alex - Possibly the most interesting team in the league. Young pup Maye anchoring looks like a bright future is ahead. McBride and Kyren? Also solid. Middle-aged (for football) Waddle in a new environment? We shall see… and AJ Brown + Davante + Evans as the older dogs on the WR crew. We likely have some entertaining programming ahead.
X-FACTORS: 1) New faces in new places - Waddle in Denver/Brown in New England/Evans in “San Francisco.” Curious to see how it pans out. 2) Father Time - Evans falls on this side of the proverbial Venn diagram too, but this time with Davante Adams. Can these dogs put up another season for the record books? 3) Giants & Cardinals RB rooms - Many experts feel that the playing time for Skattebo and Allgeier are fairly set going into the season, but both rooms have multiple players who could reasonably take snaps.

9 @ianamunrud - (legal) Tank alert. Assets have been shipped and eyes are on the '27 draft class already (probably). But With Chase, Flowers, Burden, Judkins, Swift, Dobbins, and Loveland this team might accidentally win more games that we think they want to. Though starting Cam Ward might actually help the cause.
X-FACTORS: 1) Chase & Loveland: two perceived top players at this position. They could contribute enough to some ‘accidental’ wins. 2) Trades: This team has been acquiring picks and waiting for Stock’s team to stop tanking. Will we see more deals in-season from this team to better solidify its current and future plans? 3) Jon - see below

10 @jonathan - While the team above is actively selling, this team may have walked right into some favorable draft capital in 2027. If we were playing re-draft, Josh Allen would be the only top option in the starting lineup.
X-FACTORS: 1) WRs - If Jayden Reed and Josh Downs turn into the 1’s on their respective teams, we may have a different story here. Makai Lemon also received 1st round draft capital (as did Golden) so… I’m telling you there’s a chance. 2) RB2s - this is NFL RB2s, not fantasy ones. Will the likes of Kamara, Brian Robinson, Gainwell, McGowen, and Jordan James see the field enough to be fantasy relevant? 3) Kyle Pitts - which 4 games will he be scoring 70 points in?

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May you have great enjoyment watching football and chatting with the dudes for the 2026 season!

[jonathan]

VIBES ONLY

1. Charbs
2. Ventura
3. GARRETT
4. Chasen
5. Melton
6. Alex
7. Paul
8. Amunrud
9. Stock
10. Jonathan

[ianamunrud]

Alright another season, let’s go!

1. @IanC I’m pretty sure his bench would make the playoffs. This team has zero weaknesses. We’re just waiting for the window to close and that looks like it’s going to be a long time away. Best starting lineup, best bench, hopefully we can draft all the good players before his pick at 10 next year.

2. @gbhart Okay I’m going a bit wildcard here. And I always forget how bad of a negative it is being so far away, but…he’s already making use of the autosubs and I just love his RBs. I think JT, Saquon, and J Cook are enough to make my trade for his first not as good as I would hope. I also think Burrow gonna go off this year.

3. @chasenrogers This might be the last year this team is ranked this high…the window is closing. But he’s still got a solid solid starting lineup and is here for this year to contend. CMC, Walker, Montgomery, CD, Olave, DJ in Buf…Hurts, Kittle. This team should be ranked higher. His WR depth is lacking and majory injury concerns for CMC, but RB depth is decent. I think this team has a shot at it all.

4. @awmelman This team is stronnng. Gibbs could be a league winner, but his other RBs are major injury risks. WRs are soliddddd with JJ due for a bounce back year, plus Wilson ready to come back. Egbuka Di Beppo is interesting to watch. Do we see first half or second half Emeka?

5. @ventura I was down on JSN and Puka last year and boy was that a bad take, but I’m ready to double down. I think JSN has a slight regression and Puka is insane and injury prone. The RBs are decent even with Jacobs gone for the foreseeable future. I think the Herbert/McConk stack is gonna be lethal.

6. @Alex Trey BAE is ready to rock again. I think one of Kyren and insert NYG RB here will have a good week enough to carry this team to playoffs. AJ Brown ready to show up and give Drake even more value. Relying on old guy WRs to still got it, but a) I think they do in fact still got it and b) i don’t hate the options on the bench if they don’t got it.

7. @mikeastock I’m less trusting of young/rookie players and I’m scared of injury risk for his RBs. Also I think this is a team that’s going to be hard to set the correct lineup for. Not a ton of clear set em and forget em type of players. I think this team is on the up, but still not ready to contend. Still needs time to grow.

8. @PaulDawg I do think this team had some luck on his side last year. I think playoffs are a possibilty, but I think it’ll just fall short. The RBs are good, but the WRs are true wildcard for this team. Rashee-roni, DK, and MHJ are really high risk high reward guys. Also wondering if it’s finally time for the breakout season for OkonkWOW. But who knows, maybe his kicker will be the fantasy number 1 scorer again this year, lol.

9. @ianamunrud Admittedly I’m selling hard, speaking of which: hit me up for trades. QB is weak, RB is a bunch of underestimated guys i think. WRs are solid and hopefully don’t win me too many games. TEs are young but high upside.

10. @jonathan QB is awesome. Josh Allen can put this team on his back, doe his RBs are trash. Bucky/Gainwell stack locks in one good RB starter per weak, but the other spot is reliant on backups to have value. WRs aren’t terrible, but not great. Really really needs the packers to either focus in on one of his guys, or spread the ball around enough to have both be relevant. I’ve never been sold on Pitts, but he could be a real bright spot for this team.

[ventura]

2026 RANKINGS

A highly scientific ranking. See attached

METHODOLOGY:
I looked up Hugh Jackman’s movies on Letterboxed, sorted by rating high to low, skipped all the stupid BS that isn’t movies, and placed each team’s highest scorer last year (or one of top 3, all QBs is boring) in Hugh Jackman’s place in that movie. I skipped anything on streaming because I believe in Going to the Movies

Ranking thus is how much I’d want to see the movie that your top scorer plays Hugh Jackman playing Hugh Jackman’s role in that movie.

1. @gbhart Van Helsing, starring Jonathan Taylor as Gabriel Van Helsing
   I haven’t seen this whole movie all the way through but it is pretty cool to think about. And I think Taylor’ head in the photoshop is pretty cool looking. Imagine if a vampire hunter was sponsored by Under Armour? And if he killed a vampire and did a sick celly after? That would be pretty badass. Wins championship with style and grace.
   

   

2. @awmelman Les Miserables, starring Jahmyr Gibbs as Jean Valjean / Prisoner 24601 / Monsieur Le Maire
   I am listening to the Les Miserables (2012) soundtrack right now. I don’t know how Jahmyr Gibbs sings but he might be a decent fill in for Valjean. You gotta be: -buff -strong -imposing -kindhearted -slightly fruity with your arch-nemesis/pursuer. I dont know anything about him but I bet he could find those qualities somewhere deep inside. I would like to see his wistful gaze (in my photoshop) have very thinly veiled one-sided homoerotic sexual tension with Inspector Javert (the opposing team’s middle linebacker perhaps). Gibbs vs Crowe. Team puts up a strong start but due to overly altruistic move mid-season jeopardizes postseason chances. Toss up
   

   

3. @ianamunrud Real Steel, starring D’Andre Swift as Charlie Kenton
   He looks so happy. I think this would really brighten up this movie. Maybe in addition to boxing the robot could learn about love and connection. Did you guys know Evangeline Lilly is in this movie? I would watch most movies with Evangeline Lilly in them. She’s great. Lost, Ant-Man, Uhhhh what was I talking about again?
   

   

4. @chasenrogers X-Men: Days of Future Past, starring AI Christian McCafforrey as Hugh Jackman / Wolverine From 1973
   I was going to keep looking for pictures but this was the first thing that came up when i searched. an AI ad for cigarette starring Christian McCaffrey. Though I think it came from the middle east or turkey so it’s probably more like Muslim McCaffrey but STILL. I think he would do OK as james howlett/logan/weapon x. He has some rugged AI-generated charm and the cigarette is somewhat analogous to Wolverines favorite snack, canadian whisky and beer. Maybe they could give CMC (MMC) some adamantium bones as payment. Team does well on Throwback Jersey night, nearly loses, is thrown into the ocean by opponent’s team using magnetism and/or large power transformers.
   

   

5. @jonathan The Greatest Showman, starring Kenny Gainwell as The Showman (PT Barnum)
   Looks like he really wants to be in that show, man. He has an inviting face. I have never seen this movie. Team makes admirable run but misses playoffs by wide margin, but looks great doing it.
   

   

6. @IanC Prisoners, starring Lamar Jackson as Prisoner (I assume)
   Apparently this is a pretty highly regarded movie. Never seen it. This photo makes it look more like a scene from The Wire (because its in Baltimore!!!). That’s probably a positive? Lamar looks like he’s really sticking it to the Riddler here so I would probably watch this on a redeye after I get tired of my 20th sudoku. Team misses playoffs due to players being suspended for foul language
   

   

7. @Alex The Sheep Detective, starring Drake Maye as Detective Lamb(?)
   Starting to get into non-watch territory. I watched the super bowl. I don’t think Maye has what it takes to solve the sheep mystery. He doesn’t want to feed that sheep. How can he investigate their crimes if he doesn’t want to be around the lambs? Ewe, he says. Team flames out week 6, appoints investigator to determine problem, investigator gets lost. Team forced by league to play all 2027 season games abroad
   

   

8. @mikeastock Deadpool 3, starring Ashton Jeanty as Wolverinepool
   I’m gonna be honest while I enjoyed the regular deadpool 3 as an extremely brain-off movie, I would not want to watch it again. I really dont want to hear ryan reynolds’ quips about how canadians dont have football…team is disqualified from playoffs for breaking the fourth wall too many times
   

   

9. @ventura The Prestige, starring Kyler Murray as The Prestigious Guy
   Never seen this movie but I really don’t trust Murray to carry a scene. He looks bored in the pic and also there are no Xbox in the Prestige Cinematic universe? Nonstarter. This is a Tubi original
   

   

10. @PaulDawg Logan, starring Bo Nix as Logan / Oldverine
    Hahahahahahaha come on man hahahahahaha I laughed the whole time making this pic. It looks like a still from the upcoming Chris Hansen movie. Why dont you take a seat over there mr. weapon X. oh you said you were going to “pop” a “claw” hmm sir. oh youre 226 years old, that makes it even worse. hahahahahahahahahahha
    

Thats all for now. Thanks
Use my code BETSONJACKSOFF for 10% bonus on parlays on Jackshi

[Alex]

Another year, another Woofening babyyyyy. That’s right, the DAWG rankings have returned for their 2026 installment. As a refresher, DAWG rankings are not your traditional power rankings metric. Rather than looking at the strength of a roster, they look at the strength of the roster’s leadership. This list is all about appreciating the DAWG in all of us, but also with a competitive flair. As a reminder, for those who might not remember what DAWG stands for:

1. Determination – This one is fairly straightforward. How motivated is this coach to win it all this season? Is this a coach showing up to shitpost with the boys, or is this a coach who is primarily invested in going the distance?
2. Availability – As the saying goes, the best ability is availability. Just being motivated isn’t what makes someone the ultimate DAWG. A coach who is constantly needing to play catchup or find spare time to manage their team is going to have a hard time making good use of that determination.
3. Wisdom – A true DAWG knows where to invest and where to pull back. If you aren’t able to recognize when it’s time to cut ties with an investment, you’ll quickly find yourself knee deep in players who have no long-term or short-term value and that’s a situation no coach wants to be in.
4. Grit – Ultimately, being a DAWG is an exercise in grit. In grinding it out. In pushing through the fear of over cautiousness and being willing to risk it sometimes for the biscuit. A true DAWG needs to know when to set conventional wisdom to the side for a moment and to go full-send.

And with that, I present the 2026 DAWG preseason rankings:

1. @IanC: This dude exudes DAWGhood. I keep trying to hold his DAWGiness down and he keeps showing me why he’s a perennial top DAWG. Even a down year for this team is a rock solid season for most. As perhaps the leagues most notorious bachelor, he’s certainly got the availability part down, and determination to stay on top of things despite frequent globe trotting. His wisdom to build a roster that competes year after year despite frequently drafting at the bottom of the order cannot be denied. And, above all, the grit to grind it out each year, to be the glue that holds our ship together.
2. @ventura: This might be a surprise. After all, top DAWGs have usually not be home to anyone with an incoming baby, given the substantial hit to the A brand new fatherhood can be (or renewed new fatherhood). But I think this perennial near-contender doesn’t get enough credit for his D or his G. While his A has always been his downfall, I actually think fatherhood might be a boon, not a bust. This guy is going to have absolutely nothing to do and no where to be starting in late October and I bet he’s going to be deep in the slack thread strutting his D and his A like you’ve never seen before.
3. @ianamunrud: Woof master general, only a fool would think both Ians would occupy the top three DAWGs. While his team may not be built for February, his spirit is. And being a true topDAWG isn’t about the team you’re given, but what you do with them.
4. @PaulDawg: I mean, it’s in his name. Of course he was going to end up as a higher order DAWG. This team gets the benefit of eastern time zones this year, which means he’s technically living in the future and will know how things play out before the rest of us. I mean, that’s how time zones work, right? Regardless, my guy Paul is always one of my top DAWGs and I couldn’t imagine leaving him out of the top half.
5. @chasenrogers: Despite his occupational situation, I’m buying low on this DAWG (That’s right, we’re officially in non-bolded DAWGs now). This team has a pretty impressive D, though I think it’s not quite the strongest of our crew this year. But what he lacks in D, he assuredly makes up for it in AWG. The elder statements of the league, he exudes that W, and waking up each day to corral two small children takes no small amount of G. (he’s also currently unemployed, which is an unavoidable excess of A…)
6. @Alex: Oh hi there, it’s me again. I won’t talk about my D, as I think it can be tough to measure the robustness of your D from up close, you really need the external perspective of another person. That said, I find myself in a bit of an “we’re getting too old for this shit” predicament, which on the one hand suggests ample W, but belies a clear step back in G. As for my A, there’s enough to go around, but probably only once around.
7. @Mike: Hard to question his D, this guy has remained engaged over the years despite starting and running his own company. But there are reasonable questions about the A, which makes this canine more of a DaWG. I love being proven wrong (but I never am, so why even try), so I’m always open to this team showing me up, but I suspect a lower tier woofing out of this team this season.
8. @jonathan: Less a direct indictment of his DAWGhood and more a ploy for motivation. This DAWG just recently got to take enough step up that corporate ladder, which is a big WOOF WOOF but is also a hit to all aspects of DAWGhood as his workday attention gets further pulled in more important directions. Because as we all know, the best fantasy DAWGs can mostly ignore work for at least 30min-1hr a day, which might be tough for this big DAWG.
9. @awmelman: I’m sure I routinely put this guy in the DAWGhouse and I’m sure he routinely proves me wrong (and kicks my teams ass in the process). Being a top DAWG doesn’t guarantee fantasy success, and I think this coach exemplifies that. He’s a humble DAWG, which makes being a true top DAWG a real challenge.
10. @gbhart: While the biggest of DAWGs in my heart, my head recognizes he’s this year’s bottom dawg. The time zone struggle can claim victims despite all best efforts, which secures a simple a unfortunately. While I in no way begrudge it, I think this coach could earn a bigger D and G if he was willing to stay up all night on football Sundays to ensure he didn’t miss any last minute injuries, but that’s a rough ask.

Yet at the end of the day, everyone of these fine fellas is the truest of DAWGs in my book. Cheers to more than a decade of playing this silly game. Woof woof, my DAWGs.